I was reading through Crunch Gear and came across
Smittens – mittens for lovers.
Oddly enough, these things are available through one of my favorite stores, Restoration Hardware.
Ok, really? REALLY?
Trust me, I love my wife, Angela, but if we were to ever use these things I would expect us to have matching outfits. Oh, and she’d have to be dragging my lifeless body along with her because, after being forced to put those things on, I would have killed myself.
On the flipside (I’m Filippino! Get it? ‘Flip-side’?!), should I not off myself I imagine that we would get on each others nerves and we would wind up as the two guys fighting in Michael Jackson’s ‘Beat It’ video.
DO IT!!!! I put money on Angela beating you senseless!!!
Its like the retarded cousin of the Snuggie.
NO!!!
That’s like the…..the toilet for two….but public.
What if you want to go in one direction and Angela wants to go in the other?!
What if one of you is an amputee?? Or if both of you want to be the one walking on the left????
Buddy, if I caught you with those *I* would kill you. And then take your wife for my own. kekekeke!
Recent conversation with Inkblot:
Me: aight, yo. i gots to run to a meeting
Inkblot: have fun
Inkblot: stay warm!
Me: I will walk with one of my smittens empty, waiting for someone to fill it
Inkblot: AWE!!!!
Me: *sniffle*