Ah, yes. Tis this season to be…well…you decide what you want to be. I always start out the same: Anticipation builds and builds to get to Thanksgiving and visions of the ‘Good old Christmas’ times stick in my head. You know what those are – images of snow, fireplaces, everybody smiling, Bob Cratchet giving Ebenezer Scrooge the finger, holiday lights, and good will toward man. Every year I get that feeling of “I’m going to finally get into the Christmas spirit and it is going to be WONDERFUL this year!” You have no idea how much I really want to revel in the spirit of the holidays.

Alas, it rarely works out that way. Normally I get turned off by the whole thing sometime around…let’s see…Labor Day when they start rolling out the Christmas decorations. But that’s ok, I’ll just try to keep a stiff upper lip and make it through Halloween, Veteran’s Day and Thanksgiving. Then I’ll be a happy holiday boy! Oh, yeah! I’ll go shopping and buy presents and do all the cool things with Christmas! I can just picture the wonderfulness now!

* happily drives around doing Christmas shopping *

[ get’s beat down by the throngs of people who seem to have let civility go in order to fulfill their own personal agendas during the season ]

* drives home dejected *

Why does it have to be this way? Why can’t people just look you in the eyes and smile? WHY CAN’T I JUST TELL PEOPLE MERRY CHRISTMAS?!?!

I suppose I’ll just take it one day at a time. Since Thanksgiving is around the corner I’ll just concentrate on making my fat ass fatter with all the turkey day goodness. Ahhhh! Nothing like not having to cook! There’s also nothing like being invited to several different houses to gorge.

I’ve always wondered how people who are new to this country feel about Thanksgiving. Ah, well. I’ll ponder that during my turkey coma as Angela drives me to our next dinner.

* raises a glass of wine *

Here’s to you, gentle readers! Go forth and unleash your holiday bad-assedness upon the world!

(nope, that still didn’t get me in the holiday spirit. I’ll keep trying)