Random recap of the ’08 Beijing Summer Olympics

So, as the Summer Olympics come to a close, and I shed a small tear that they are [almost] over, let’s recap the 2008 Summer Olympics . . . in Beijing?!

Swimming
First of all, how great is it to be Michael Phelps right now? I mean, seriously, in a matter of two weeks, this kid went from quasi-famous swimmer, to superstar overnight. He has now become a fixture on the celebrity blogs, with even Perez Hilton paying homage to him every day since just before the Olympics began. Then, I hear that he just dropped $1.69 million or so on a Condo on the Baltimore waterfront. Oh, and did I mention it is expected that he will earn close to $100 million over the course of his life? I mean, this kid is on FIRE. Plus, Lindsey Lohan thinks he is “f – – -ing amazing,” so this kid really is cool right now! Maybe I am in the wrong business, I am thinking of taking up an Olympic event, maybe shooting, or archery – you know, something I don’t have to be in killer shape to participate in – then maybe I can pay millions for a waterfront condo. . . or no? I mean, who wants to see a shooter on a box of Wheaties, right?

Gymnastics
How about our Ladies Gymnastics team! Granted, they didn’t win the all-around Gold medal, which instead went to host country, China. Suffice it to say I do not agree with that decision, however I won’t go into that subject. But Shawn Johnson and Nastia Liukin are about as good as you can get. Together, they took home nine medals – and two of them were gold. I am still amazed by all the gymnasts, I think the closest I can come to flipping on a balance beam is walking on the curb of a sidewalk, which typically ends with a scraped knee. Oh, real quick – Alicia Sacramone got ripped off, plain and simple. I am not sure what the judges were thinking by awarding a higher score to a gymnast who FELL on her vault . . . oh wait, that is right, they were simply rewarding the host nation.

Track & Field
US Track and Field team – seriously, did you even show up? I mean, how can (1) the US Men’s 4×100 meter relay QUALIFYING team drop the baton only to be immediately followed by (2) the US Women’s 4×100 meter relay QUALIFYING team dropping the baton – at the same place the men did? In addition, not a single US woman even medaled in the 100 meter race, and our best 110 meter hurdler, Lolo Jones falls on her face – literally. I mean, I can go on and on, this has been a joke of a showing for the US Track and Field – it is truly a shame. Maybe it is because our track stars are treated like royalty, pampered and held up as if they are above everyone else. Maybe it is because there is a sense of infighting amongst the teammates (ahem, Jeremy Wariner and LaShawn Merritt), or maybe the US cracking down on the use of performance enhancing drugs has caused our athletes to fall so far below the rest of the world, we do not even deserve to be there. Whatever the reason, I can only hope for better from our track and field athletes in the London 2012 games.

Beach Volleyball
Oh, and I have a new favorite sport, Beach Volleyball!!! Misty May-Treanor and Kerri Walsh are my new heroes. Along with Todd Rogers and his 6’9″ partner, Phil Dalhausser- really? – they are just sick! But I have a word of advice for the other countries in the world, when playing Walsh/May-Treanor, don’t piss them off (yes, Brazil, I am talking about you – way to kick them off their practice court, only to get destroyed by them an hour later) and really, Belgium – send some beach volleyball players that appear to be slightly in shape. . .come on! Oh, now there is an idea, maybe beach volleyball will be my new sport . . . oh wait, I’d end up looking like the out of shape Belgium players, never mind!

Well, see you in London Bitches!!!