Reason Why I Don’t Watch ‘Dancing With The Stars’ & Why I’m Not In Showbiz

Online Conversations I’ve Had Today:

Me: Hehehe…
Me: I’m trying to get Amy to bet me whether or not Heather Mills leg flies off while she’s spinning on Dancing with the Stars
Wife: dude thats all over vegas
Wife: she’s even been asked about it happening
Me: If I were her I’d just loosen it and let it go
Me: Then I’d make her partner dance the bunny hop with me.
Me: you know
Me: ’cause she only has one leg
Wife: *shakes head
Me: 🙂
Me: hehehe…
Me: makes you wonder if the people backstage
Me: before she’s about to go on
Me: say ‘Heather, go out there and break a leg…’
Me: then they just look at each other
Me: blinking
Wife: aww man
Wife: youre not right
Me: 🙂

Me: Gosh, its tough being me all the time…
Wife: yea
Wife: your poor wife

Stacy: i’m not an all u can eat buffet u know
Me: oh, meow
Me: kinky
Me: you should get that tattooed
Me: just over your underwear’s waistband
Me: ‘Stacy’s All You Can Eat Buffet’
Stacy: u’re sick!
Me: and then an arrow pointing down
Stacy: perv
Stacy: i knew u’d say something likethat
Stacy: sicko
Me: but that’s why you love me!!!
Stacy: hahahahahhaha
Stacy: yeah, your dirty lil mind
Stacy: oh yeah, did i tell u i got a tattoo?
Me: the buffet one?
Stacy: NO
Stacy: tard
Me: you got ‘tard’ tattooed on you?!
Me: wow
Stacy: hahahahahahaha
Stacy: har har
Stacy: very funny