Why I Love Owning A Website

I love owning heyitcouldbeworse.com. I really do and I’m really happy with the number and type of readers that I get. However, there were two situations this weekend which made me sit down and think about the whole thing.

My sister won’t read my site.
I found this absolutely fascinating. While celebrating my father’s birthday on Friday I asked my sister if she wanted to see the damage to my house (which, by the way, still isn’t fixed). While looking through my photo gallery, I asked if she still refused to read my site. Her explanation was “I’m not going to read it because I don’t want to read if you have something bad to say about something that happened in the past, like ‘I hate my sister because…'”. >_< She won't read it because of that? I thought she wouldn't read it because of the occaissional NSFW content or because she didn't want her daughters to read it. I don't get it. In fact, I don't think I've said anything bad about my family. Plus, my site is pretty much PG-13 (for those of you who are into video games, it is rated T). I really think it is a shame that she doesn't want to read my stuff. It makes me think that what I post must be really bad or that I'm not entertaining. There may have been only one post where I included content that may have been offensive to her when she first came to my site, Doinking As Parents: Another Reason Not To Have Kids, but even that wasn’t so bad. Ah, well. Such a shame that she would much rather avoid me rather than see if I have anything worthwhile to say. And a pox on any of you who says I have nothing worthwhile to say.

People search for the damndest things
I decided to look at my statistics for the first time in a long while. When you look at your log analysis you can see what people are looking for via search engines. Interestingly enough, for the month of July, 2006, here are the first few key phrases which dropped people onto my site:

  • michelle sigona
  • melissa thiereau
  • kerri-lee halkett
  • puzzy pictures
  • bugatti.veyron.videos
  • videos of men walking with erections
  • good pranks to peoples house
  • children are better than pets
  • indepence day poem
  • harijuku clothing
  • phobia of neck touching

Huh? Ok, that really wasn’t too bad. Although the ‘puzzy pictures’ one made me a little suspect. Was someone looking for pictures of me? MASOCHIST!! And I love the ‘videos of men walking with erections’ entry. Who the hell wants to see that? (Mental note, I must set up a video to catch me when I first roll out of bed in the morning) And then it got weirder. I continued read through the logs and I started to find interesting entries such as the following:

  • sex puzzy picture
  • water in my house will not shutoff
  • sex with a contortionist girl
  • david schwimmer hair cut
  • sexy asian barber shops

WTF?? I just don’t really know what to say. You’ll have to excuse me now while I complain about the water in my house and then go to my friend Yang’s barbershop to get my haircut like david schwimmer so that I can get ready to go out on a date and then have sex with my contortionist wife. And take pics.