Bits & Pieces

Man, I haven’t updated this sucker in over a week. Who knew that time would fly by so quickly?? Let’s play catch up and then I’ll update this in two days. 😉

Beautiful Women & Musical Tastes

I’ll admit that I don’t have the best taste in music. I’ll listen to almost anything but, when it gets down to it, I’m more likely than not to have country music playing in my truck while I’m tooling down the road. Hell, I’ll be screeching out the lyrics like an angry owl caught in a paper shredder while I’m driving. But, I digress. Here is a head scratcher that I’ve come across: there are several women in my life that I think are hot. One of them happens to be my wife; another is my friend Amy. Speaking to them on separate occaissions, they both said something that disturbed me.

Wife: After repeated listens to that new Justin Timberlake song I’m starting to like…

I quickly stopped her like I was throwing my body on a grenade. Don’t. Finish. That. Sentence.

My friend Amy and I were pulling up to a house in our trucks. I was listening to some pretty peppy country music. When she got out of her truck, I get:

Amy: What are you listening to? I was just listening to the new Nick Lachey song. I like it.

I believe that it was at that point that I died inside. ACK. Justin Timberlake? Nick Lachey?! Oh, dear Lord. Is there any way that I can exorcise whatever evil spirits are within them and causing them to speak such lunacy?

My friend Cammy (bless her soul) was smoking hot. Gorgeous face, long blond hair, and an amazing body. Wonderful personality, too. Aside from the numerous cancers which wound up taking her life, I believe God looked down upon her and decided it was time for a Cammy recall due to her musical tastes. NSync? Backstreet Boys? Tiffany & Deborah Gibson? CELINE DION????? AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH! THANK YOU, GOD, FOR TAKING HER BECAUSE IF YOU DIDN”T I WAS GOING TO HELP THINGS ALONG!!

Let’s Stick Things In Our Mouth!

I don’t know why, but I like to freak out Angela by sticking large quantities of food in my mouth all at once. An entire Twinkie. An entire Twix bar. A muffin. Angela, wanna see how much of this hamburger I can bite off? Look! I’m the Blue Man Group! I’m sticking marshmallows in my mouth!

Nevermind the fact that I like weird foods. I just have the compulsion to shove things there (please, all of you sophomoric boobs please stop pointing at your dicks hoping that I’ll pull a George Michael).

One time, I got two full sized pancakes in my maw.

Ok, more later. Me sleepy.